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Things You Only Do Once - hopefully...

#1 User is offline   benos 

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Posted 25 June 2006 - 09:04 PM

I guess this forum's the best place to start this. ;)

This one is guy only...

Remember that first time... When you threaded your belt through the first loop, then gave 'er a nice, sharp tug - and the buckle-end whipped up, down, then back up like a bullwhip and cracked you right in the balls.
:o
I may have done that twice actually.
:lol:
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#2 User is offline   warpspeed 

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Posted 25 June 2006 - 09:30 PM

I once had some 2x4's that were 16' long that I wanted to bring home from the lumber yard. I figured I could ope then sliding rear window on the pick up truck and just put them through so only a couple of feet would hang over the tail gate.

Well I slid a couple up and all was going as planned. Then about the 3rd one went all the way to the windshield - crack!

I have since been more cautious.
"If you were one of America's Founders, and you'd just surprised the world... by winning a war of secession against the most powerful and heavy-handed government on the planet, and the last thing in the world you wanted for yourself, for your children, or for your grandchildren was to fall beneath the heels of its jackboots again, what would you want the Bill of Rights to mean? And if the first act, under martial law, of that powerful, heavy-handed government had been to try to take your guns away at Lexington and Concord, would you have written a Second Amendment to guarantee its 'right' to own and carry weapons? Would you have written a Second Amendment that was subject to whatever government claims is 'reasonable regulation'? Or would you have written the Second Amendment to forbid government from having anything to do with your guns?"

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#3 User is offline   Kory 

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Posted 25 June 2006 - 10:18 PM

Spend several hours welding with a MiG wearing short a sleeve V-neck, because your buddy that just gave you the five minute into to welding class didn't mention anything about having all the skin blister and fall off your biceps and neck later that night from the most intense sunburn you'll ever have in your life.

#4 User is offline   smokshwn 

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Posted 25 June 2006 - 10:30 PM

Slam your fingers in a locked car door when your keys are in your offside pocket. :o

God that hurt!

This post has been edited by smokshwn: 25 June 2006 - 10:31 PM

Team FIREBIRD

A friend of mine told me "Your work has really made you cynical" my reply was "Cynical.....I passed cynical five years ago....I now live in reality"

Considering the amount of fancy equipment now seen in competition, some readers have complained loudly that the 'average guy' does not have a chance. It might be pointed out that this average guy never has had a chance. Competition is held to determine what is best, not what is average. And if all the equipment were standardized, the man who won would still not be in any sense average.

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#5 User is offline   Skywalker 

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Posted 25 June 2006 - 11:38 PM

Man only, huh?

OK,

never, and I mean NEVER, ever try to enter sidewise in a shower stall that has sliding panels, while your pride and joy isn't under full control, otherwise it might get pinched between the sliding panels ... :wacko:

And, the incontrollable laughter from your wife who was trying to get out of the shower (and actually opening the panels) while you were entering won't help at all ... <_<
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#6 User is offline   Vlad 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 03:06 AM

Hmm .. I changed my windshield wipers once and I let the arm drop to the windshield while I had the wiper part off. Instant cracked windshield. Never again I hope.
Vlad A49908

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#7 User is offline   Hank Ellis 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 06:53 AM

Another guy only ...

When cinching down the legstraps of your skydiving rig, make sure none of your 'package' is caught under the straps. It will be painfully obvious of your error on canopy deployment.

Every male jumper I know has done this, once. One did it twice but I think he enjoyed it.
A mind is like a parachute. Neither functions properly unless fully opened.
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#8 User is offline   Flexmoney 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 07:14 AM

Thumb behind the slide.

And, for new Open shooters, thumb behind the racker.
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#9 User is offline   George 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 08:07 AM

50 gallons of gasoline in the tank of a diesel truck.

Another thing I will only do once is to touch a Cholla cactus ;-)
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#10 User is offline   SiG Lady 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 08:09 AM

Gender-neutral event: Table saw, cutting 2x4's, and somehow the length of lumber shot forward and stuck itself in the middle of a huge plate glass window (this was the dining room, mind you). It happened so fast the hole in the glass was the perfect outline of a 2x4 end. Significant other not home at the time. My first thought was, "Crap, it could've shot back AT me and killed me!!" (or at least ruined my sexual options) :o :blink: Then I looked at the window, then I thought, "Oh shit, is Mike (the hubby not home at the time) going to be pi**ed!!" Turns out he wasn't as pi**ed as I thought he was going to be, but the replacement window piece was a killer expense. The little rectangular hole in the window stayed there awhile.
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#11 User is offline   tightloop 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 08:24 AM

Trying to change the plugs in my '77 Regal..got 7 of them..could not get the last plug on the right bank...finally threw my socket through the windshield...Younger and more easily frustrated back then...mechanic went over the tire and wheel with a flex socket the next day...did not ask about the windshield, but did see it and smile... :)

#12 User is online   XRe 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 10:25 AM

View PostFlexmoney, on Jun 26 2006, 09:14 AM, said:

And, for new Open shooters, thumb behind the racker.


Even for experienced Open shooters! :wacko:
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#13 User is offline   bberkley 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 10:35 AM

View PostFlexmoney, on Jun 26 2006, 07:14 AM, said:

Thumb behind the slide.

And, for new Open shooters, thumb behind the racker.


You would think this would be a self-rectifying problem, but I have done it 4 times! Three times during Area 1. : :wacko: :wacko:

My thumb is still a bit sore there.
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#14 User is offline   Erik Warren 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 11:18 AM

Quote

This one is guy only...


Put boxer shorts on backward and didn't notice it until facing the urinal at work, trying to find the fly.
how many kids they've murdered only god can say
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#15 User is offline   j2fast 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 12:02 PM

This might apply more in the young and stupid category but...

After approximately a 12 pack or so each some friends and I decided it was a good idea to venture through the train tunnel just beyond the clearing we had made our drinking area that evening. After all it's 1AM trains don't come through in the middle of the night in this area we said. The tunnel in question was about 800 meters long and we were about 80% of the way through when we questioned what the flashing yellow light was beyond the end of the tunnel. As it turns out the crossing signal lights on the PA side of the tunnel were yellow. We'd never seen yellow crossing lights, all of the crossing lights on the WV side are red. A few moments later the dead give-away was the single white light pretty high off of the ground with a Conrail sign under it.

Now we could have easily and semi safely made it to the short end but of course given our state of drunkenness we turned to run the other way (the long way). We were strapping athletic lads at the time but the girls slowed us down (everyone almost made it). Needless to say I spent the better part of 10 minutes up against a wall about 100 meters short of getting out with a train rolling past at what seemed at the time like 100 MPH with two screaming young ladies on either side of me. No suffered any permanent physical damage and of course our wives now tell us how stupid we were every time we recount the story.

Ahhh to be an early 20 something again with no bills, responsibilities, and in this case with no sense to speak of..... :ph34r: :lol: :D

This post has been edited by j2fast: 26 June 2006 - 12:03 PM

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#16 User is offline   Bob Hostetter 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 01:07 PM

Never fry bacon while naked.................
Bob Hostetter

#17 User is offline   tightloop 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 01:29 PM

Bob

that is probably in the top 3 of what NOT to do while naked... :lol:

#18 User is offline   SiG Lady 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 01:33 PM

:P :P Eric, that's HILARIOUS!!!!!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHA...!!!!
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#19 User is offline   spook 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 02:38 PM

Guy only...

Pee against an electric fence.
Cross your legs before you sit on a chair (don't ask).
Have your expert horse back riding GF take you on your first ride with you wearing boxer shorts instead of briefs.
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The above post is just my opinion. It isn't better than anyone else's and there's a good chance that it is BS, and based on theory instead of experience. The best scenario is that I based my opinion on my experiences. But these may be totally different from yours.
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#20 User is offline   outerlimits 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 02:56 PM

removing a drain plug in a small bass boat while in the middle of a lake, only to drive back to the boat ramp with one finger stuck in the plug opening...
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#21 User is offline   SiG Lady 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 03:05 PM

Quote

"Cross your legs before you sit on a chair (don't ask)."
Uh... that's physically kinda hard to do no matter which gender you are.....! :huh: <_<

I won't ask. :ph34r:
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#22 User is offline   Flatland Shooter 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 03:06 PM

Gotta add one to the "don't do while naked".

Don't ever walk naked through the house if you have a new playful puppy thats looking for its favorite chew toy. No permanent damage done. And I don't really miss that dog either. :(
"I haven't failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
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#23 User is offline   AlamoShooter 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 04:30 PM

One time ...I told some one else about somthing stupid that I did. I dont' do that any more :D
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#24 User is offline   BrianH 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 05:59 PM

Late for class running towards a ramp with a hand rail made of 3 inch dia. steel pipe. Note book in my right hand and I think I'm gonna vault the sumbitch one-handed like Mickey Fowler going over a wall. Almost made it, caught my toe on the rail took full body weight right between the legs. Had to sit there in class for an hour wondering if that was blood I felt or not...
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#25 User is offline   Cuz 

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Posted 26 June 2006 - 06:27 PM

View PostAlamoShooter, on Jun 26 2006, 07:30 PM, said:

One time ...I told some one else about somthing stupid that I did. I dont' do that any more :D


+1 on that bit of advice. Some things are better kept to yourself and the few witnesses who happened to be doing it with you at the time...
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